The Legends are almost at the end of their chaotic season. The problems with the magical creatures have veered from comedic to terrifying, and often both at once. Now, they continue the corrupting of a long-time ally, the possession of another, and a tough choice that goes poorly. There’s also a fairly brilliant reason the episode is called “Terms of Service.”
Just outside Washington DC in 2019, we see a very young Zari and her mother in a small slice of their home life. The tv has a commercial that makes some surprising claims, hosted by Legend/hero/demon host Ray Palmer. On the Waverider, the team debates what to do, in between bouts of getting loopy over their dragon egg. Nora reports in from the Time Bureau, where she’s been hiding and skulking around, and offers a report that makes Ava look ill.
Tabitha, revealed as the Fairy Godmother, is already heartily sick of granting Gary’s wishes, and keeps hinting at him to do more extreme stuff to the Legends. She cackles about the time Constantine is probably having in Hell. They show John’s arrival again, with someone watching closely. Back at the Time Bureau, Mona coins a new nickname for the possessed Ray, while Neron outlines his current plan, or at least some of it. Nora watches this as the rest of the team arms up to take back the Bureau, with a sarcastic aside from Zari.
Gary continues to lament about the way the Legends have treated him (and he does have some fair grievances), and he makes another wish, which isn’t what anyone was expecting and knocks the attempted take-back off track before it starts. Some of the team tries to reason with Gary, and we learn that he’s been treated even worse on some fronts than we knew. While Neron tortures Mona, Gary makes more wishes, and Sara manages to slip a warning to Nate. Zari suggests a plan B, while Mick makes an amusing comment about his own attention span. Constantine runs a minor scam on an attractive demon, and then is surprised when she knows his name.
Gary goads his captive audience a bit too far and they leap to attack, but Tabitha stops them. That’s a bit odd, since Gary didn’t wish for that one. Gary makes a new wish, and he and his captives switch to the Waverider. There’s a brief delay as Tabitha keeps Nora behind for a little chat with a few surprising hints. This gives us a little background on Tabitha and Neron’s relationship. Nora then gets sent to accompany “Ner-Ray” to the PalmerX event, and he threatens her into cooperating. I’m finding it interesting that Neron takes every opportunity to belittle and insult Ray. I’m wondering if Ray might be the key to defeating him after all. The rest of the team infiltrates PalmerX as “Ray” makes some surprising announcements. He rolls out a new app called “EYES” and then, when questioned about his claims, brings Mona on stage.
Constantine visits a strip club in Hell, because of course he does. He touches base with a contact and we learn a bit more about how Hell is ruled and some of what Neron is up to. I have to say, Hell being, at least in part, an analogue to the stock market is a very darkly amusing twist. Constantine gets caught, but talks his way out of immediate death at least. Gary flirts with Gideon, which is disturbing, and finds a new mission for the team, but is still squeamish about things.
“Ner-Ray” tells his audience a bit about Mona, or at least a twisted version of her story, while Gary decides he wants more people to play with. Sara tries to talk him out of it, but the Waverider soon has more captive Legends. Mona puts on a show for the audience, and Ray’s ATOM suit gets even more Iron Man-like, which is impressive. Charlie and Zari barely make it out, and Ner-Ray uses the chaos and fear to push his EYES app again. Nate and Mick end up confused in their new situation, and Gary makes an unfortunate wardrobe change.
“Ray” talks to one of his assistants and muses on ways to get more downloads. Tabitha uses some “wiggle room” to bring Nora to Mona, makes some more hints, and vanishes. Zari and Charlie end up in an unexpected hideout, which leads to Zari giving us some more detail about her past. Zari makes a very important discovery about what “Ner-Ray” is up to.
Gary is continuing to enjoy his new role, and the rest of the Legends are decidedly not. Zari warns the rest of the team about what’s really going on, leading to Zari and Charlie undertaking a desperate mission. The team tries to talk Gary down, and he points out some true, and really sad, things about the situation. Then he sort of snaps and starts taking things out on the team, in very uniquely, bizarre, neurotic ways. Charlie and Zari have a heart-felt talk, and get going on their plan, forgetting something very important as they go.
John gets brought to the ruling Triumvirate, and there’s some truly odd bargaining. John is forced to make a choice after reliving one of the worst moments of his life, and his team isn’t going to be happy. Charlie and Zari start off their mission, while Nora gets more worried about Mona. Gary has a crisis of conscience about what he’s doing, and gets Tabitha to stop. Nora comes to a decision which causes Tabitha to leave Gary with a nasty comment on her way out. Sara appeals to Gary, talking about how Rip first selected the Legends way back when. The team and Gary come to a sort of apology to each other.
Tabitha presents Nora with an interesting offer, which Mona tries to stop. There’s more than one evil magical being making tricky deals this season. Things start falling apart quickly as Charlie makes her way through the Bureau. Things get so confusing, even Ner-Ray loses track of what’s going on for a moment. Charlie makes a brave decision, taking a big risk, while “Ray” plots some more evil and figures out what’s going on around him. Gary comes to a decision and makes another wish, which doesn’t go quite as he expected. He doesn’t see it, but many of the other Legends do. Mona gets rescued, but at a cost, and Ner-Ray and Tabitha start spinning things to their advantage.
Constantine gets a series of crushing revelations, Hell becoming more than just a location for him. Most of the team is safe, and trying to figure out how to care for their new charges. They keep patching things up with Gary, which is nice. Zari and Nate hug and then Zari realizes what she forgot earlier. The episode ends on something that might be changing the timeline again, and we’ve seen how well that goes lately.
What I liked: Ner-Ray (and I love that name) ‘s plan is a brilliant spin on the old “deal with a devil” idea. Tabitha was pretty slick with what she did, too. Gary, for all that he’s something of a villain for the majority of the episode, has some legitimate grievances. Mick got a great line about how he listens. Ner-Ray is also being clever in using Ray’s face and reputation in his plan.
What I didn’t: John, for all that he’s prideful and egotistical, should have realized something bad was coming. I’m really hoping Ray gets a chance to fight back somehow, but they’re really running out of time for that.
I’m very fond of this band of loveable screwups. They have embraced their silliness and really make it work. I’m giving this one a 3.5 out of 5, and I’m really curious to see how this all wraps up next episode.