When All Hope Is Gone

Hope. What do you do when you lose all your hope?

First of all, when someone says hope, the first thing that comes to my mind is Superman. And also the character from The Shawshank Redemption, Andy Dufresne. But those are really powerful characters, and it’s fascinating to see how they progress under hard circumstances and still carry the hope with them. But can we do the same when life throws battles in front of us? And if we can, can we stay the same person we were before?

Now, as time goes on, as we get new experiences in life, we kind of get exposed to sad, tragic, maybe even horrible stories. And under this new-age nonsense stress, we not only battle with those things every day, but we also battle with ourselves. This kind of journey in today’s world tires our mind, tires our existence. Even Clark Kent on some days would probably look at all of this and just say, “Yeah, I need a break.”

But maybe that’s exactly why Superman comes to my mind when I think about hope. Superman is one of those characters who has almost everything people would want. He is powerful, he can fly, he can save people, and he basically has the ability to change the world. But I don’t think what makes him interesting is the fact that he’s strong. It’s the fact that he keeps choosing to be good when he has every reason to become something else. Think about it. Clark Kent is an alien, right? He was sent to Earth as a baby, grew up knowing he was different, and eventually became someone who carries the hopes of millions of people. That’s a lot to put on one person. And yet, whenever the world is falling apart, Superman still shows up. That… that idea always gets me. Because hope is easy when everything is going well. It’s easy to say everything will be okay when you have a good day, when you have people around you, when you have something to look forward to. But what happens when none of those things are there anymore?

What happens when you wake up and you genuinely don’t know what you are doing with your life?

And that’s where Andy Dufresne comes in, my friend. In The Shawshank Redemption, Andy loses almost everything. His freedom, his old life, years of his life itself. And Shawshank is designed to make people lose hope, as you know. That’s basically what the place does. It slowly takes pieces of you until you become used to being there. But Andy keeps something inside himself. And that’s something called hope. There is that famous conversation between Andy and Red where Andy talks about hope. I still remember it. Red thinks hope is dangerous. But Andy sees it differently. Now, Red has accepted his reality. But Andy refuses to completely accept it. I think maybe sometimes we need a little bit of Andy inside us. Because there are moments in life where being realistic can almost become another way of giving up. You start telling yourself, “This is just how things are.” Then days become weeks, weeks become months, and before you even notice it, you’ve stopped expecting anything good to happen. I think everyone experiences something like this at some point. Maybe you lose someone. Maybe someone leaves you. Maybe you fail at something you spent years working for. Maybe you look at yourself and realize you are not the person you thought you were going to become. And sometimes there isn’t even one big reason. Sometimes life just slowly becomes heavy. You carry one thing, then another, then another, until one morning you realize you are tired of carrying anything at all. Some mornings we might just wake up and say, like, “What the hell am I living around here for?”

Now that’s… that’s hard. And that reminds me of Peter Parker. Why? Well, because Spider-Man is probably one of the best examples of someone who keeps moving even when life keeps taking things from him. Uncle Ben. Gwen Stacy. His relationships. And his normal life. There are so many versions of Peter Parker where the guy just gets punched by life over and over again. That’s just freaking sad. And still, still this freaking dude puts the mask on and does what he’s supposed to do. I always found that interesting about him. He doesn’t wake up every morning feeling like a hero. Most of the time he is broke, lonely, and sometimes even angry. And he makes stupid decisions. Like… a lot. And many times he loses people he loves. But when someone needs help? He’s right there, man. And that’s just beautiful. Maybe that’s what hope actually looks like, you know. Maybe hope isn’t always some huge feeling inside you telling you that everything is gonna be perfect. Sometimes hope is just getting up the next morning. Sometimes it is answering a message. Going outside, you know, walking, making something. Watching a movie. Going to work. Trying again after you already failed. Small things. And also, there’s another character I think about when talking about this, and that’s Bruce Wayne. The Dark Knight himself. Batman is a weird example of hope because he is probably one of the darkest characters on this list. He lives in a city that seems almost impossible to fix. Every time he puts one criminal away, another one shows up. Now, let’s look at him in more detail… His parents are dead, his enemies keep coming back. He could easily look at Gotham and decide that nothing matters anymore. But he doesn’t. He keeps going. And maybe that’s why Batman and Superman work so well together, I don’t know. Superman believes people can be better, as you know, and Batman has seen how bad people can become. One carries hope almost naturally, while the other has to fight for it every single day.

Then there is Logan. Oh my dear, Logan… I’m gonna talk about the movie version. Logan (2017) is probably one of the saddest superhero movies for me because Logan has almost completely lost his hope. He is tired. He is old. He has lost people. He doesn’t really believe in the future anymore. And then Laura comes into his life. Suddenly, this guy who had basically given up has something to protect again. I think that’s something we forget sometimes. Hope can come from other people too. A friend. A family member. Someone you barely know. Even a character from a movie can give you something when you need it. I know that sounds kinda stupid. How can a fictional character help a real person? But stories have been doing that for thousands of years. We see people suffer, fail, lose everything, and somehow continue. We see ourselves in them. Maybe that’s why we keep coming back to these stories. I think sometimes you need to see somebody else keep going before you can convince yourself to do it too.

And then there is The Lord of the Rings. Samwise Gamgee is probably one of the simplest examples of hope in fiction. He is tired. He is scared. He has every reason to turn back. Frodo becomes harder to recognize as the journey continues, and everything around them feels like it is dying. But that little hobbit Sam keeps walking. And there is something about that which feels very human. You don’t always keep going because you believe you are going to win. Sometimes you keep going because someone beside you needs you to. And maybe this is the part that matters most. We talk about hope like it is something you either have or you don’t. Like one day you wake up with hope inside you and everything suddenly becomes easier. I don’t think it works like that.

Look, I know that sometimes hope disappears… I think we all lose hope in life at some point. It can happen after losing someone, failing at something, or simply getting tired of everything around you. Even the strongest people have their breaking point.

But let’s think about Superman again for a second. If Superman lost his hope completely, would he still be Superman? Maybe not. But Superman is also a character written by humans, for humans. He was never created because people had no problems. He was created because people had problems and still wanted to believe that someone could stand up when everything else was falling apart. Maybe that’s what these characters give us, you know. A little reminder. Andy reminds us to keep something inside ourselves that prison can’t take. Peter reminds us that responsibility doesn’t disappear just because life hurts. Batman reminds us that you can keep fighting even when the world gives you very little reason to. Logan reminds us that sometimes a new person can give an old life a new meaning. And Sam reminds us that sometimes you just have to take the next step. One step. Then another. And another…

I don’t know if we can stay the same person after going through hard things. Honestly, I don’t think we can. Life changes you. Losing people changes you. Failure changes you. Even happiness changes you. But maybe we don’t need to stay the same, right? Maybe the goal isn’t to come out of every horrible experience exactly the same person you were before. Maybe the goal is to come out of it still being someone you can respect. Someone who can still care. Someone who can still love. Someone who can still look at another person and say, “You’re gonna be okay.” Even if you don’t fully believe it yourself yet.

So what do you do when all hope is gone?

I don’t really have some perfect answer for that, dude. I wish I did. But I can give you my maybe list. Now, hope is gone, and you don’t know what to do. Okay, what I’m telling you is that maybe you just wait. Maybe you keep moving. Maybe you let someone help you. Maybe you watch that stupid movie you’ve already watched ten times. Maybe tomorrow feels exactly like today, and then the next day is the same. But eventually, something changes. A person enters your life. A song hits differently. You see something beautiful. You make something you are proud of. You laugh when you weren’t expecting to. And for a few seconds, you remember that you are still here. Maybe that’s enough for now.

Hope doesn’t always have to look like Superman flying above Metropolis with the whole world cheering for him. Sometimes hope is just a person sitting alone in their room, having a terrible day, and deciding they’re going to see what tomorrow looks like. And honestly, I think that’s pretty damn heroic too.

So that’s it. Thanks for reading. I don’t know where you are in your life right now. Maybe everything is going great. Maybe you’re fighting something nobody else knows about. Maybe you’re tired of hearing that things will get better. I get it. But if you’re still here, there is still another page to turn.

Take care, keep going, and maybe, just maybe, don’t give up on hope yet. I’ll see you in the next one.